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Monday, April 13, 2009

Snowbird Regulations

I live in a state that depends on the kindness of others to exist. Meaning, we depend on retired Northern individuals to come to Florida to escape from the harsh winters up North (fondly referred to as Snowbirds). Many of them even come from another country (Canada).

Now, don't get me wrong, Snowbirds are wonderful people and our state could not exist without them. They come into our state/community and buy groceries, go out to eat, shop and visit the many tourist sites around the area, they volunteer at non-profit organizations. They spend money here!! They are good for the economy!! They also own second homes here and don't get any breaks on taxes, etc.

I truly do appreciate our Snowbirds, but I really feel there has to be some sort of regulations put into place and now is the time to do it. Now, when the Snowbirds are headed back to their Northern residences and families. We have about 6 months to get these regulations in place, approved at the State level and sent to each of the Snowbirds at their "permanent" residence.

It would a simple agreement between said Snowbird and the permanent residents of the State of Florida. Something that as they come into the state, they pull over at the "Welcome to Florida" Rest Area and read the agreement and sign it. Nothing too difficult.

Agreement as follows:

  • Snowbird will not schedule Dr. Appointments before 9 am or after 3 pm. See, as a working person, I schedule my Dr. appointments either first thing in the morning or the last appointment of the day. I work all day and I can't be taking off in the middle of the afternoon for an appointment. You are not working, you are retired, you can come to the Dr. in the middle of the day.
  • Snowbird will not make a left hand turn in the far right lane. (shouldn't need any explanation on that one)
  • Snowbird will not go to the bank (and/or post office) between the hours of noon and 2 pm. Again, I am a working person and try to do my banking during my lunch 1/2 hour. Yes, I only get a 1/2 an hour for lunch, so standing in line at the bank while you have the teller balance your check book or try and teach you how to use the ATM, does not make my day.
  • Snowbird will not go grocery shopping on Saturday or Sunday. Since I work Monday thru Friday, I tend to use Saturday and/or Sunday as my grocery shopping day. Now, mind you, I don't see a problem if you have to run in quickly to pick up another package of Depends, but come on, you have 5 other days of the week to pick up all that other stuff. There is no reason for you to park your shopping cart in the middle of the aisle, and study every can of green beans on the shelf.
  • In order to drive, Snowbird must be able to see over the steering wheel of their car. If you cannot see over the steering wheel and must see through it, I highly recommend you get a booster seat. They make them, they are available and maybe then you won't have to make that left hand turn from the far right lane.
  • Snowbird will look behind them when they are backing up in the parking lot. Going in reverse until you hit something, does not constitute looking.
  • Snowbird will follow the posted speed limits. Which means, if the speed limit is 45 you will drive 45, not 25 and hold us all up behind you as your peer through the steering wheel, trying to see over the huge front end of your Lincoln, trying to figure out which left you really do want, that one, oh no the next one, oh wait, I needed the one back there so let's stop and start backing up...

And last but not least,

  • Snowbirds required to be on oxygen cannot drive. Putting the oxygen tank in the back seat so you can still breath while driving does not work. If you are on oxygen don't drive!

These are just my suggestions.

7 comments:

Avitable said...

Ha! I support this agreement 100%.

Anonymous said...

This is very funny, THANKS FOR STOPPING BY AND YOU ARE ENTERED IN THE CONTEST.. GOOD LUCK.. BEACH STUFF IS ALWAYS GOOD..

THE QUEEN..

Ann(ie) said...

I fully plan to be a snowbird one day and I promise I will follow these rules!!!!

Apron Strings said...

Where are you? Winter's over and the snow birds have left Florida and Phoenix! Come back! luv, Granny

Anonymous said...

I also plan to be a snowbird one day and will follow the rules.

Ann(ie) said...

I wanna add you to be my friend on facebook. Will you email me. :) annmiller71@comcast dot net.

b said...

I live in Arizona for six months of the year and this really, really made me laugh...cough, cough! I do promise that if I ever go on oxygen or shrink so I can't see over the steering wheel, I will probably not drive. I promise...Maybe! :-D

b