Was It Only Last Year

January 2008 I wrote this, it was all a lie...well not all a lie..my sister was at the house taking care of my parents, our father.

January 12, 2009 he died...and with his death, my sister learned the truth..she is not the most important person in the world..she is not someone who people will look to for assistance, or even look to for guidance. Why not??? Because my sister is a drug addict who is taking advantage of everyone who ever loved her or cared about her.

My sister was able to go off of the drugs when she got pregnant...by her "fiance"..well that is what Larry has been introduced as to everyone..she even uses his last name sometimes....(we assume she was off the drugs only because the baby was born perfect)

She gave birth to a beautiful, healthy little girl..a child who has been exposed to some of the ugliest parts of life. I have to say, I am only guessing at the last statement..I have not personally seen anything that I can say puts the 1 year old girl at risk...only conversations over the phone.

Since January 12, 2009 our lives have all changed. My mother came to Florida this fall and spent 9 weeks here. She left my sister in charge of the house, paying her bills (all she had to do was mail the envelopes),.

When she arrived home, the house was a disaster, worse than a disaster, unlivable..just found out tonight (months later) that my sister had let some "friends" live there....she didn't mail the bills on time.....didn't do a lot of things.

Now my sister is mad at me because she can't understand why her "fiance" is in communications with his ex wife..I told her so what? You communicate with your ex..(he has custody of her 3 boys because she was determined unfit due to her drug use).

She hung up on my and screamed and yelled at our mother...slammed doors...screamed some more and left the house...

Note to my Sister:

Hello? You aren't even there..you drop off your child and leave..you spend your nights elsewhere...you are the reason you don't have a relationship..you are the reason he went to jail..you are the reason he doesn't care about you...

You told me that you don't want to be with him..here is your opportunity...

Oh wait..I forgot..you don't work because you are disabled...you haven't worked in 25 years...since you got married the first time...

Wow..you had an affair on your second husband....after a 20 year marriage (that you claimed was abusive)...we did find out that you were the abuser..of drugs.

The next time you are answer our mothers phone, and I ask to speak to our mother.....if you throw the phone and break it, I don't care what our mother says, I am calling the police on you, you will go to jail and I will make sure you do not have any contact with any of your children...including the baby girl.

You are out of control and need help, help I or mom, or your "friends" cannot provide. You need to check yourself into a facility..you need to be away from your "friends"...you need to Grow Up!!

My sister is a drug addict and tonight, on the road to destruction...2,000 miles away.

Busy, Busy, Busy...

That's the way it is around here right now. I am in the middle of the major fundraising portion of the year for my job. Grant writing....

Why is it, every major grant has to come out between March and April, with due dates the end of April and fiscal year start dates of July 1. Our budget is $1.3 million and right now, I have about 1/2 of that sitting on my desk. The other 1/2 will be out in June and July for October start dates. Those aren't so bad, there are only 3 or 4 but 6??? Now???

The grants due this time of year are the majority of our 3 year grants. For the last couple of years I've been lucky, had renewals that had to go in. Adjust the Objectives, Outcomes, new budgets, etc. Not that big of a deal. Well, now we have to rewrite the whole thing and they are open to other agencies, which means much more competitive. Especially in the current economic climate.

Anyone else tired of that term "current economic climate"? Makes it sound like it is going to get better right? Don't bet on it. Even with this stimulus money coming down, I don't think things are going to get better for at least another 5 years. Maybe slight improvements, but that's it.

We didn't have pay raises last year, I don't see them coming this year. Not with the budgets I have been seeing. Even if we qualify for some stimulus money, it will just fill in the gaps that we currently have, maybe be able to fill one of the empty positions that we have. We aren't filling positions after people leave either, no money.

Not a good thing when you work for a domestic violence & sexual assault center. You need to have staff to work in the shelter, you need staff to take those hotline calls that come in 24/7. You need staff to go to court with rape victims who are finally getting a chance to testify at the trial for a rape that occurred 2 years ago. We need staff to be able to pick up battered women and bring them into the shelter so they will be safe and not end up dead or beaten in a truck stop somewhere.

Okay, that is my rant for the day. Anyone know any more funny jokes??

Email from a Friend

Pet Rules... To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1. They live here. You don't.

2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it 'fur'niture.)

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

4. To you, it's an animal. To me , he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less.
2. Don't ask for money all the time.
3. Are easier to train.
4. Normally come when called.
5. Never ask to drive the car.
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends.
7. Don't smoke or drink.
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions.
9. Don't want to wear your clothes.
10. Don't need a 'gazillion' dollars for college.
And finally,
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Man Rant!

What is it about laundry that you just don't understand???

Hmmm??? Anyone???

How do your clothes end up on the floor on the side of the bed. I've done everything I can to get you to drop them in the laundry basket. I have even moved said basket to your side of the bed...

Checking basket and side of bed, nope, not there. Oh look, on the floor.

How in the hell do you manage to take your shirt off without unbuttoning it? Do you have any clue how long it takes to unbutton it? Why does it need to be unbuttoned? Because it won't end up knotted around everything else in the washing machine.

Hey, another tip, ashtrays are all around. Even outside they have those wonderful inventions, ashtrays. Instead of leaving your cigarette butts in your pocket, why not throw them in the ashtray...or say garbage can? Especially since you have already field stripped them.

Argh!!

So, it really is all about the money?

Mark Lunsford, the father of Jessie Lunsford, has filed an intent to sue against the Citrus County Sheriff's Dept., Florida Department of Law Enforcement and the Citrus County Commission.

If you are not aware of who this gentleman is (and I use that term lightly, at this point) his daughter, Jessie was taken from her bedroom in 2005 by sexual predator John Cooey. She was held in a trailer near her home, sexually assaulted repeatedly, then buried alive in a black plastic bag in a hole near the trailer where she was kept. If you want to catch up on the entire story, go here.

Mark Lunsford has supported law enforcement since then. Bike runs have been done to raise money for "Jessie's Place" a child advocacy center opened in Citrus County in her name. There are fundraisers being held throughout the nation. He established a foundation in her name with all the donations that were raised. He has been instrumental in getting legislation passed throughout the country to provide harsher penalties to sexual predators, better tracking of them.

The reports say he and Jessie's mother are suing. He does not live with Jessie's mother. She lives in another state and was not living with Mark or Jessie when she was abducted. In fact, Mr. Lunsford was not even home that evening. Jessie was at home with her grandparents, but no father.

Last year the bike run in our community (not far from Citrus County) had over 2,000 bikes riding in it. It was held again this weekend, after the report came out. Only 400 bikers showed up.

Mr. Lunsford better be careful, or all that will remain of the memory of his daughter will be that her father was a money grubbing bum.

"Gently Used"...

As I have mentioned many times, I work at a domestic and sexual violence center. We operate a 24 bed shelter, have legal advocates that help with injunctions, go to court, etc. We provide group and individual counseling, both adult and child. We have a 24 hour hotline, provide training and education to community organizations, law enforcement, medical personnel, whoever requests it.

We are funded through grants, both federal and state. We receive funding from private foundations and donations from individuals. We do fundraisers, boy do we ever do fundraisers...everything from Clam Bakes to Wine Tastings, from Fashion Shows to a Peace Breakfast. That is my job, grant writing and events...Development Director.

Even with all of that, we still would not be able to stay in business without our Thrift Store. Our program participants are able to shop for free at the Thrift Store. We have furniture, household items, clothing, just about anything and everything they would need to start their lives over. Those items are also offered for sale to the public at greatly reduced prices. I have found some great deals there and most of my suits are purchased there.

We have two volunteers who take our truck out in the community to pick up the larger items. We advertise that we accept "gently used" items and furniture in "good condition".

Now, I am not sure what part of "gently used" or "good condition" people don't understand. You would not believe some of the things we receive. Clothing in bags that are mildewed, or worse yet smelling of cat spray! Ripped, dirty and filthy items. And our volunteers have to sort this crap. Then we have the TV's and computers...they swear they work and they don't. Or the wonderful bedroom set...yeah right don't get me started.

We have a huge construction dumpster that we use for the garbage, we also have a burn pile that we use for that furniture that is destroyed. Of course, the TV's and Computers and monitors are a different story. We have to take them to the dump and yes, they charge us. We are charged by the garbage company when they pick up the dumpster.

So what is the reason behind this rant? This year, when you are cleaning out your closets, when you are looking to donate items. Please be aware, please be honest, don't send your garbage to a non-profit. Throw it away yourself. Don't make us pay to get rid of it.